As a Black LGBTQ+ student, navigating university life can be particularly challenging. Not only must we balance all the aspects of life that come with being human, but we often face indescribable intrapersonal conflict, societal prejudice, and outright homophobia and transphobia. The lack of minimal representation, tailored safe spaces, and specific resources enjoyed by other marginalised groups can make our journey more difficult and isolating. However, that is not the end of our story.
The resilience we possess as queer people, especially as queer people of color, because of our unique life experiences, pushes us not only to survive but to thrive. In the midst of all that surviving and thriving, we can often forget to look after our own immediate wellbeing. Recognising these factors can help demystify your feelings and reduce self-blame. This article aims to shed light on these experiences and provide practical steps you may find helpful for maintaining mental wellbeing.
Maintaining your wellbeing
Make time for joyful activities
Engage in Culturally Relevant Hobbies: Participate in activities that not only bring you peace and joy but also connect you to your cultural roots. This could include listening to music from your heritage, cooking traditional dishes, or engaging in cultural art forms.
Mindfulness and Relaxation: Practices such as yoga and meditation can be particularly beneficial. Consider guided sessions that focus on the experiences of black people and/or people of color.
Scheduled Breaks: Incorporate regular breaks in your study routine to relax and rejuvenate. Use this time to engage in activities that celebrate your identity, such as reading literature by Black LGBTQ+ authors.
Find community
Join culturally specific groups: Seek out Black LGBTQ+ student societies, both on-campus and online. If there aren’t any specific black queer spaces, create your own or consider exploring traditional black or LGBTQ+ student spaces These groups provide a safe space to share experiences and build a supportive network but do not come without challenges. (Check out my other article on navigating these spaces as a Black Queer student!)
Online communities: There are numerous online platforms for Black LGBTQ+ individuals. These platforms offer advice, support, and a sense of belonging.
Events and gatherings: Attend events and gatherings that celebrate Black and LGBTQ+ identities. UK Black Pride and similar events can be great opportunities to connect with others who share similar experiences.
Create your own personal safe space
Physical safe space: Designate a space where you feel safe and comfortable, decorated with items that reflect your identity and culture. This could be a room, a corner with personal artifacts, or a digital space where you can relax and unwind.
Expressive outlets: Create a journal, a wall of expression, or a digital platform where you can freely express your thoughts and feelings. This can be a powerful way to process emotions and maintain mental clarity.
Boundaries: Protect your sacred space by setting clear boundaries. Let others know that this space is off-limits and respect your need for solitude and reflection.
Keep your body and mind healthy
Eat healthy, exercise, meditate, sleep. Also be mindful of your sexual practices and make informed decisions. Black Beetle Health provide helpful sexual health resources for Black LGBTQ+ people.
Remember who you are
Self-affirmation: Regularly remind yourself of your strengths, achievements, and the unique qualities that make you who you are. Positive affirmations can build self-confidence and resilience.
Celebrate achievements: Acknowledge and celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small. This can boost your morale and provide motivation to continue striving for your goals.
Self-compassion: Be kind to yourself and recognise that it's okay to struggle. Everyone has their own journey, and it's important to treat yourself with the same compassion you would offer to others.
Protecting your wellbeing
Avoid media content that upsets or angers you
Curate positive content: Add positive Black and/or LGBTQ+ media sources to your routine. Follow social media accounts, podcasts, and blogs that celebrate and uplift Black and/or LGBTQ+ voices and stories.
Avoid people who make you feel unhappy, unworthy or unsafe
Set boundaries: Clearly communicate your boundaries with individuals who may be unsupportive or a detriment to your wellbeing. It's okay to distance yourself from relationships that negatively impact your mental health.
Seek supportive relationships: Focus on building and nurturing relationships with people who respect and support you. Surrounding yourself with positive influences can improve your overall wellbeing.
Self-care: Prioritise self-care and recognize that it's okay to put your needs first. Taking time away from or seeking support to move away entirely from toxic people is a crucial step in protecting your mental health.
Avoid unwelcoming spaces
Seek inclusive environments: Participate in events and spaces that are inclusive and welcoming to the Black LGBTQ+ community. These environments can provide a sense of safety and belonging.
Communicate needs: Let your friends and loved ones know which spaces are not safe for you, whether physically or emotionally. Advocate for your safety and comfort.
Choose sober spaces: Consider attending more sober or low-key events that may offer a safer and more comfortable environment for socialising.
Refresh when necessary
Spiritual refresh: Engage in spiritual practices that resonate with you, such as meditation, prayer, or rituals that help you feel grounded and centered. Explore practices from your cultural heritage that promote healing and wellbeing.
Media refresh: Periodically detox from social media and other media sources. This can help you refocus and reduce the impact of negative content on your mental health.
Social refresh: Evaluate your social circles and distance yourself from negative influences. Surround yourself with individuals who uplift and support you.
Seek help when you need it
Professional support: Don’t hesitate to seek help from counsellors, therapists, or other mental health professionals who have experience working with Black LGBTQ+ individuals. They can provide valuable tools and strategies to manage stress and improve your wellbeing.
Support networks: Reach out to your chosen family, friends, professors, or support groups. Talking about your experiences and seeking advice can provide relief and guidance.
Crisis resources: Be aware of crisis resources and hotlines that are available for immediate support. Knowing where to turn in times of need can be a crucial safety net.
As I began to think about what advice to offer, I couldn’t help but think how we as queer people, especially as queer people of colour, often already know what we need to do. You may reflect and realise we already have the tools and methods we need to maintain our wellbeing.
So, with that said, I wrote this piece only as a reminder. A reminder to look after your wellbeing. A reminder to put into action the remedies you know work for you or perhaps to try new things. And, lastly, a reminder to take time to celebrate how far you have come and to enjoy life!
